Pen-pricks

• President Biden signed the Covid Origins Bill into law after it passed unanimously in the House and Senate. I felt pretty stupid after the revelations that natural immunity worked just as well as the vaccine and that masks didn’t matter. We didn’t follow the science, we followed the television.

• President Biden vetoed a bill to ban pensions from investing in companies based on their climate change cooperation. One decade it’s an Ice Age, next decade it’s Global Warming. I’ve been watching the weather a long time and to save the planet, I advise oil companies to start donating to Democrats, too.

• National Geographic published an article on unknown species in the ocean and disclosed that Australians have been eating a fish that was previously unknown to science. That’s a huge relief. Generally it is the other way around, a fish previously unknown to science has been eating Australians.

• The Parents Rights Act passed in the House amid demands by parents that teachers stop pushing a social agenda and teach the basics instead. I’m so glad I learned about parallelograms in high school math instead of how to do my taxes. It comes in really handy during parallelogram season.